Mary here at 5:50 AM 4-8-04
Maxim did get the letter of referral yesterday, but it was late, so we stayed in Kyiv last night, and are out early this morning. He is picking us up at 7 this morning for our drive to Ivankiv. I understand it is about an hour to an hour and a half northwest of here. He asked at the NAC for the letter to be issued yesterday, and they told him to call back after 3 to see if it was ready. Well, the letter was written for us, but the director still had to sign it, and she was out of the office. They weren't sure if she was coming back before the close of business or not. Either way, we were staying in Kyiv one more night, but getting the letter yesterday, allows us to leave that much earlier today.

I woke up early, about 5, to the sound of birds! What a beautiful sound. In Vegas, I never hear the birds in the spring. I know we have them, I see them, and evidence of them, but other than pigeons, I have not heard birds. It was such a sweet sound!

The kids called last night and that was wonderful to talk to them again. Julie is working on her book of calamities while mom and dad are out of town, and true to form, the hot water heater "broke" and water was all over the garage floor! We aren't sure if it broke, or if the overflow valve needs replacing. Hopefully, one of the kind neighborhood dads will come and take a look at it for us (and them). In the meantime, they get to pretend they are in Ukraine, in an apartment with no hot water!

Last evening was very uneventful and welcoming. We walked to our grocery store and got stuff for dinner and breakfast. Came home, ate, (ham and cheese sandwiches) and read while waiting for Maxim to call with our leaving time, and the kids to call with home news. Now, we are up, ready to go, getting last minute things packed and eating breakfast.

Next update, from Ivankiv.

Mary

3:00pm
WOW, what a morning!
Maxim was on time, we loaded and left by 7AM. It started out drizzling, but within a short amount of time, it was really raining hard. All the way to Ivankiv, it poured. The driving was really fine. We were stuck behind a truck part of the time, and Yuri, our driver, tried numerous times to pass, but each time he would look, he decided against it, for which I’m glad. There were no “playing chicken” games on this drive!

We arrived in Ivankiv at 8:30, and Maxim had called ahead to the inspector’s office. We stopped by, but she was not there. She was teaching a class at a local secondary school. Instead we decided to go to the orphanage, and see if the director would at least see us and give us some information on the kids, then we would get the “direction” after that, and hopefully meet the kids after they were out of school for the day. At the orphanage, the director was out-she was teaching a class at the other secondary school. The orphanage called ahead and she agreed to meet us at the school. Maxim went into see how we would do this, and soon returned to the car with the director and Tanya! Then we drove to the kindergarden, which here is like “preschool”, and the director and Tanya got Dima and brought him out. Then we all drove back to the orphanage, where we could sit and chat. The director gave us a tour of the orphanage, and while we were out, the kitchen workers set out a very nice “tea” for us in the reception room. Then our driver drove her back to the school, and we stayed to talk with Tanya and Dima.

Dima is sooo small. He is 6, will be 7 in June, but the average size of about a 4 year old. And so cute. He kept smiling shyly at Jim, trying to catch his eye. We brought out a couple of books we brought along, and he just jumped at the chance to show off his alphabet skills, counting skills, etc… He did not want Tanya prompting him in any way! We showed them the photo album we brought with us, and they were very excited to see our house, kids, grandma, dogs, etc… Tanya ran and got a photo album she has of some pictures of her and her friends. She is proud of it. She knows most of the letters in the alphabet, and can sound out many words. The biggest bonus is that although shy, she is really ready and willing to try. We sat with my Ukrainian phrase book trying to communicate. It worked!

Emily, guess what? Tanya does not like soccer, but does like basketball! And she likes to run track and field. She ran in a 1K race yesterday and took first place in the city! She describes herself as a “sportsgirl”. She will fit right in our family. We stayed and visited with them for about an hour and a half. We were really just getting warmed up, starting to loose some of those “first date” jitters on both sides, when Maxim returned and said we had to go right then. The plan was to go pick up the director, (who they had returned to school) then go to the other school to pick up the inspector, then return us all to the orphanage, where we would formally “meet” the children, under the watchful eye of the inspector. I guess this is the way it is supposed to be done, since we didn’t have the “direction” when they had let us meet them. So, off we were to accomplish yet another round of pick ups and drop offs. I guess the kids just miss that day of school.

Once back at the orphanage, we went to the director’s office where they brought Tanya and Dima into meet us. We were back to square one! I hope all of this was explained to them, what we were doing, or else they think we are total idiots for going over AGAIN the picture album, etc… When we left the first time, Dima was totally comfortable with Jim, now, under the watchful gaze of all of these adults, he sat nervously on Tanya’s lap. The inspector wanted to talk with Tanya and Dima first, privately, then with us. When it was our turn, she was not friendly AT ALL. I don’t know if we were missing something in the translation or what. Even Maxim says he cannot figure out what she was getting at. She kept talking about how we are going to make sure that these kids and our kids at home are going to get along. We explained as best we could, but she was not satisfied. Finally, she brought up some “program” in Kyiv, and “offered” it to us. As best as we can understand, it is supposed to be some kind of thing where these “experts” can match children and adults who will make the best families. And this will ensure that these kids will get along with our other children. I’m not sure how. She admitted she could not require it, but it was very clear that she preferred that we take advantage of this very generous offer! Some of her comments were trying to explain it through an analogy of a man and woman get married and then decide 2 or 3 years later that they are not in love and don’t want to be married anymore. She also asked if we had ever had a conversation with someone, where it started out amicable, then we felt anxious and aggressive? (you mean like NOW??!! Only this time!)

Anyway, we declined her generous offer of the former Soviet Social Scientists studying in depth our family structure, through us, to determine if our children, who they have never met, will one day not get along with these children! I kind of felt raked over the coals, but Maxim assured us that this “institute” was not required, and she was only offering their advice and council. She would approve the paperwork without it.

We left there in search of a notary. (Left the inspector there, I’m not sure how she got back to where ever she needed to be!) There are 2 here. One does not work on Thursday (Today is Thursday) and the other was out, not sure when she would be back. Back to the orphanage, to pick up the director. Maxim spent a long time in there, and we were sure the inspector was giving him another hard time about all of this. But I don’t’ think she was there. When he came out with the director, he said they were taking us to the hotel (and I use the word lightly-more later) ordering us lunch, and then they had 2 or 3 things to do. They would be back to pick us up later, when it was time for us to sign some papers.

The hotel….the only one in Ivankiv, I believe. Now, mind you, we are not picky. Really, we are not. I just was not expecting a 2 story “trailer” to be a hotel. The room is small, painted light blue, and looks like a very small classroom in a “portable” at public schools. There are 2 smaller than single size beds, and we were each provided with a set of sheets to make that bed. There is a pillow case, a flat sheet to use as a bottom sheet and a duvet cover to place the wool blanket inside. At least that is what we have done, so if it is wrong, you all can laugh at us now! I guess the bed is comfortable, as Jim is asleep! Outside of the room, in the “entrance foyer” of the room, is the 2 room bathroom, shared by our room and the room also off of the same foyer. One room is the toilet room, one the shower room.

There is a wall plug in this room so we can charge the computer battery, but I doubt there are any internet connections in Ivankiv. We are going to try to work very hard to make this happen as soon as possible, to return to Kyiv!

Tanya was excited about coming to America. She wanted to know if we were going today. I tried to let her know, no, maybe in about 10 days. Then she asked if we could go “tonight”? I guess she really wants to come home with us. I’m so glad.

WE were more nervous about today than about the NAC meeting yesterday;. What do you say, how do you meet a child, an older child, who you are going to adopt? Do you hug? Shake hands? Immediately say how you love them? Risk scaring them off? I was not prepared to meet them while jammed in a car, but that is how it happened. When we left the orphanage for the first time after meeting them, I did hug both of them. And both squeezed back with a true, deep, affectionate hug. And then, of course, I cried.

After checking in at the hotel, Maxim took us to the restaurant in this hotel, and ordered lunch for us, then was off. We are waiting here for his return, hopefully soon, so we can sign the notary papers and I guess that is another “big step”.

I’m keeping my spirits up, looking at the bright side of things. It is raining, and instead of the wind howling through aluminum, corrigaged walls of our hotel, we could be out in it, with no place to stay for the night! And, MAJOR PLUS, this place is walking distance to the orphanage. Like I told Jim, we will only need sleep here, hopefully. We are hoping to spend all of the rest of the time at the orphanage with the kids. I’ll buy the orphanage food, too, if we can eat there with them!

Until later…..

Mary

Later it is now….6:45 PM

Maxim returned for us-through Yuri, the driver. Actually, Yuri came to our room and said “let’s go now, Maxim needs to you sign papers”. He was at the notary typing the papers, as she did not know how to do it. We got there, signed and took that paper to the orphanage, where we got to see the kids again. They met us with the best hugs! Boy, is Dima ever strong. He squeezes so tight, it is like he never wants to let go. Tanya is right there, as well. Maxim said this was what he wanted the Inspector to see, the spontaneous hugs of parents and children! Well, when sitting in an office full of adults, supposedly meeting for the first time, I would not expect exuberant greetings like that. Maxim grabbed our digital camera (good thing we taught him to use it) and took a few pictures of us with the kids, then talked to the director. Apparently, what they want to happen is the permission, or whatever it is called, to be signed by the inspector so it can be turned into the NAC tomorrow. The director sent us back to the Inspector, with directions to Maxim to “talk to her like she is a woman. You are a man, flirt a little, and get this done!” We all thought that was funny!

While in the director’s office and all of this was going on, Dima was gathering his friends, one or two at a time, and bringing them by, getting just close enough for them to see, then grinning and pulling back, running away. I saw Tanya come by a time or two with her friends, in much the same manner. Always with big smiles.

More hugs and we were off to the inspector’s office for Maxim to “flirt”. He did not get this paper signed today, but feels confident that he can get it tomorrow morning, then return it to the NAC tomorrow. We are running up against Easter weekend. This is the year that Orthodox Easter and Western Easter coincide. The director was urging us to possibly return to Kyiv this weekend and experience Orthodox Easter with all of its beautiful pageantry. We are torn. We would really love to experience that, but have no one to share it with there, so we would essentially be “alone”. On the other hand, if we stay in Ivankiv, we could spend Easter with Tanya and Dima and the other kids in the orphanage. We will talk to the director tomorrow.

If Maxim is successful in getting this document early tomorrow, and returns to Kyiv early, Jim may ride down with him, then get the bus that runs back here. I’ll stay here and visit Tanya and Dima. Of course all of this depends on what Maxim says.

For now, we are studying our translation book to be able to order something we like for dinner, at the restaurant in this hotel.

I still can’t believe this day has finally come. We have met our children. They seem truly happy to be going home. On the way out of the orphanage for the last time today, one little boy yelled “Dima mama!”. Made me cry!

FOOD ALERT ****** FOOD ALERT******** FOOD ALERT

Just back from dinner at the hotel.


WOW our best meal yet in Ukraine.

We shared a tomato cucumber salad--- sure reminds us how produce in the US has no taste

Mary had a beefsteak with mushrooms (for shame or shame for shame---as we are within zone 2 of Chernobyl), onions and cheese.

I had Max’s famous fried meat-think carnitas-- with buckwheat..

We had crepes with raspberry jam for dessert.

Plus a couple of good local beers.


I have not had a chance to write yet today-some random thoughts:

The drivers are not as bad as most say. Yuri drove us from Kyiv to Ivankiv with no problems-if anything he took things a little slow for my tastes. He is great and drivers overall are better than a Saturday night drive in Vegas.

Nice People (for the most part) Everyone involved in the care of the orphans really does want to see what is best for the kids-that means adoption. Yuri guessed that 80-90 % of the kids in the homes would end up on the street, hooking, working for the mafia or in jail. There seems to be a real desire to get these kids placed to avoid those issues.

Ivankiv orphanage is as wonderful as any orphanage could be. Bright and cheery.. warm.. loving staff. The kids seem to get along-but is isn’t family.


Causes at home seem to pale in comparison to what is happening here in the real world. The monies thrown at homeless pets, spotted owls, and the “cause of the week” are really needed here and elsewhere to help HUMANS live a better life.


As for Tanya and Dima-WOW what wonderful kids.So strong to have thrived through such adversity. They will do great in the States and I’ll be proud to be their papa.




4/09/04
Another great day.

A good night sleep in out little “Hotel Happiness” in Ivankiv. Up at 8 and Max at the door at 9:30.

We took the half mile hike to the orphanage with our electronics in tow. Video Camera, Digital camera and computer. Plus books for the kids and a KOOL Summer of Fun Beach Ball (thanks Tony).

The director called to have Tanya come back from school and pick up Dima on her way home.

Seems computers are scarce here in Ivankiv-luckily I had loaded Ukrainian (зкуеен Лщщд) on the laptop. We borrowed the keyboard from the Director’s defunct desktop and Max was able to type up the official documents of the day. (In Ukraine every official document produces another 3 official documents..you simply trade “up” until your stack is high enough to trade down the pile for the one document you really need-in our case the Judge’s ruling)

Tanya and Dima arrived about 20 minutes after the call from the Director. It was great to see them both again. Seems like we have know them forever. Big hugs and down to the “getting to know you room”. Lots of fun the beach ball. Back and forth round and round-off the head soccer style-bump, set, spike, good way to communicate without words. Next, book time, and Dima especially devoured the “First 100 words in English” and Richard Scarey’s Best Word Book Ever. Both are highly recommended to bring with you. Also, Usborne’s first 1000 words In English. Took some video, then showed them the results, along with the first part of the tape-from Marie’s birthday, Christmas, etc… They seemed to really enjoy it. They love the picture album we brought with pictures of the family, the house, the dogs, the neighborhood, etc… I don’t think you can possibly bring too many photo albums. They both wanted to keep it with them to show their friends.

We had to decide on final names today for Maxim’s documents. So, we will have a “Tatiana Catherine Stolz” and a “Dmitri James Stolz” in our family. They seem pleased with their names, and Tanya is thrilled that Dima’s middle name is Jim’s. VERY HAPPY. While I was telling Tanya what their names were, and writing it out for her, Jim, Dima, and Dima’s friend, Sergie, were playing ball. Dima purposefully brought Sergie in to “see” us, then obviously wanted him to sit and watch while he (Dima) and Jim played ball! Jim quickly included Sergie in the game, much to Dima’s dismay, but he got over it quickly. Sergie is VERY cute. Sweet, somewhat shy, just a darling little boy.

We took Tanya and Dima to the restaurant in the hotel. The first time they had ever been to a restaurant. Egg Salad, Chicken Kiev, Fries and OJ. For being a little guy, Dima ate well- Tanya too. Amazing how kids are all the same- Dima discovered the joys of blowing bubbles with a straw. Nap time is 1-it’s now 1:30. The dutiful older sister reminds us that it is time for Dima to get some rest. We walk back to the “nest” (well-I carried Dima part of the way) and got him in for his nap. On the way, back, we ran into the director and Nicoli (Tanya’s track coach). Seems our new “sports girl” will compete in the Kyiv regional track meet tomorrow (having won the 1k Ivankiv title). We’ll all travel to the meet tomorrow at 9:30. One of the best parts of that whole story is the international way we all communicated. Max was not there, Nick, the track coach spoke some very broken English, and of course, we speak very little Ukrainian. But Jim and Galina, the director both speak some German, and between the 4 of us speaking parts of 3 languages, we “got it” that we were able to accompany Tanya tomorrow on the bus, be there at 9:30 AM!

Thanks to the Hamann’s for the picture CD from when they were here-they were a big hit with the kids! Movie time-Monsters Inc on the computer. No language barrier there.

After the movie, it was time for us to get back to the room. Maxim was walking us back to the hotel, talking about whether he had missed the last “mini van” back to Kyiv for the day, or if he was going to be staying in the hotel too, tonight. (Our choice to stay in Ivankiv or go back to Kyiv for the night, or for the weekend. We wanted to stay close to the kids) As we rounded the corner, the last bus was there, so we bid him a quick “Happy Easter”, and left a very concerned for us Max getting on the bus. I think if he could, he would tattoo his cell number on our arms, so he was SURE we knew how to get a hold of him if needed. But we have our “Language and Travel Guide to Ukraine, Third Edition” with us at all times, and we are not afraid to try to communicate with people. What is the WORST that will happen? We get bottled water with carbonation? Can’t hardly get lost in Ivankiv, and we certainly won’t starve to death! Really, Maxim, RELAX, we can take care of ourselves! He seems truly impressed that we are able to communicate with Tanya! Much of that credit goes to Tanya. She is very open to trying to talk to us. She looks through the book (Language and Travel Guide) to find things to talk about, and we go from there! I also highly recommend this book!

Tomorrow is the track meet in the morning, then when we get back, the director has assigned someone to accompany us to the market with a list of things we can purchase for Easter Dinner. WE wanted to eat Easter Dinner with the kids at the orphanage, with all of the kids, but we didn’t want to impose and stretch their already thin budget. We told them that if we could eat at the orphanage, we would bring whatever they wanted to add to the dinner.The director requested some fresh fruit and lemonade for the kids, and some Easter candy. She has also assigned a couple of the bigger boys to accompany us, to the Rynok (market) help carry these things. Remember, we are walking.

Rynok--- That is a good time to pause to list some of our favorite words in Ukrainian:


Favorite word-- -- Kharashow Sounds like “Horror Show”. This is the all around “I’m okay-you’re okay” word. Cool, Swell, neato, good, okay, right, I understand-One pretty funny word does all that!

Thank You--- Spaseeba in Russian or Dyakooyou in Ukrainian.. In Kyiv most everyone used the Russian-here about half and half.

How much-Skilkee. Very helpful for knowing if a cab driver is “taking you for a ride” in addition for taking you for a ride.make sure he replies in writing… 15 and 50 sound very much alike in broken English… That is the Difference between a 3 and 10 dollar cab ride

Pectopah is restaurant--- noooooo silly, you need to remember it’s Cyrillic. Make that Restoran when you use the proper alphabet.

Moloko is Milk--- Important because in cartons that look just like milk (down to the fat content) is Kefir-which is a yummy sour milk/yogurt mix (not yummy at all if you are chugging what you think is some cool refreshing milk).

Proshoo prinehstihs shcheh pihva… May I please have another Beer?

Pehrehproshooyu deh tooahleht. Where is the Pottie.

Ahhh Potties-Kyiv they were quite nice. Clean. Plenty of paper. Ivankiv..most do not work and TP is strictly a “if you want it you better bring it from home” sort of thing. Here in the “Hotel Happiness”. They have large jugs of water in the bathroom since some of the toilets have no running water--- take a dump-dump in a couple of jugs of water and all is well.


Koshmar-That happens if you forget to bring the paper from home… it is a nightmare-bad day sort of thing… Missed the Bus, had to stand in the rain-needed to use the bus stop toilet with no paper and no flusher--- that is Koshmar.


Saturday, April 10, 2004

Mary here-Jim is ill today!
Slept well, but Jim awoke with the sickening feeling that the chicken he doubted last night, should have been left on his plate! He has not felt well all day. But we did make it to the orphanage on time, and accompanied Tanya to her track meet. First, when walking in the door, Dima was coming down the stairs. He saw me and ran, then JUMPED totally up into my arms. I did not bend down at all! He leapt all the way up for his hug.

The ride to the track meet was in a 9 passenger VW van-but there were 11 of us! On the way home, there was an extra passenger, so 12! The weather was beautiful leaving Ivankiv, cool, but sunny and the promise of warm air. An hour later, in Kyiv, it was cloudy, with a definite nip in the air. The track meet was in some woods just inside the Kyiv city limits-at least I think we saw a “city limits” type of sign. They had a path roped off for the runners, basically in a circle, seemed to be about ½ kilometer in length. Tanya ran twice around in her race, and I think she ran 1 Km, so that makes sense. The path they ran on was full of tree roots, small, ankle twisting pine cones, and occasionally some glass. We walked the path before the races began. I watched for the glass and removed whatever I saw. A large “radio” truck arrived with 4 large speakers mounted on top, and someone inside announcing racers names and numbers. We never did hear Tanya’s name.

Of course, right before she was due to run, it started to rain. Not hard, but just enough that it was downright cold out there! Makes you appreciate basketball, with the indoor court, complete with bathrooms when necessary! We arrived at the place about 11:15 am, she was due to run at 1:10. That stretched to about 1:45. (Have you ever known a sports event to run on time?) She just ran in that one race.

OK, Julie, I now how your mind works! You want to know if she won! No, she didn’t come in first. She was definitely the smallest one out there in her age group (I think they were separated by ages). She came in in the last ½. But she gave it all she had, and ran hard the entire way. It was very much fun, for those couple of minutes, watching Tanya run, which was obvious that she enjoyed doing.

Back in the van to Ivankiv, and Jim came back to the hotel. I took Tanya back to the orphanage, then told her we needed to go to the market to get fruit and lemonade. Tanya, Dima and I walked to the market. This “market” is the size of about ¼ of a 7-11! WE bought 70 bananas (yes, that is right, seventy bananas, there are 65 or 66 kids in the orphanage and we wanted to get everyone one, plus one for me, for Jim, any caregivers, etc…) and all of the oranges they had-I think 24. Carried those back, and I was expecting Tanya to take them to the kitchen. No, she immediately took them upstairs to the large music room, yelling all the way something about bananas. In one big whhoossshhhh, the room started filling up with kids, all going immediately to chairs lining the walls, waiting dutifully on the chairs for their banana. Tanya and Dima so much enjoyed handing each child a banana, proudly telling them these were from THEIR mama and papa. You have never seen children so happy to get a piece of fruit. Then, came the oranges. Tanya handed one to every 2 children, and there was enough-not everyone got to the room. The leftover bananas, along with a yogurt I had gotten for Tanya and Dima to share, and I think there were one or two oranges, were taken to Tanya’s room, where she locked them in her locker. We are talking lock and key! First, she got one for herself and a 2nd one for Dima, plus one for me. Then we walked back to the market for lemonade and candy. Lemonade is not our lemonade, it is more of a sprite, soda type of thing. We bought 12 2 liter bottles, and a bag of hard candies, enough for each child to have 2 small hard candies tomorrow. Then, I spotted the Kindereggs. If you have never watched a child with a kinder egg, you are really missing something.

They are egg size and shape, a hollow chocolate egg, with a small toy inside. We have seen them in western Europe and our kids at home always love them-ok so do we!
I told Tanya to ask how many they had, and they had 66. Well, I’m pretty sure there are under 66 children there, so I bought the entire stock of them! I hope we have enough Ukrainian money for our meals until banks open again!
I told Tanya those treats were for Easter tomorrow, and she understood. We took everything back, and she locked it in her locker, hiding the lemonade under her bed. Then we walked back to the hotel to bring Jim a banana. He was still not feeling well, so Tanya, Dima and I ate at the restaurant downstairs. After 2 bananas, Dima still had room for a big bowl of chicken/egg salad, and a large amount of his French fries. I don’t think his appetite is the cause of his size! He probably just is too picky of an eater to gain weight with the diet at the orphanage. For us, he has eaten very well!

Took the kids home, and then I came back for an early bedtime. Spending all day outside tires me out. Jim’s tummy is still not better, so it will probably be a long night for him.

Tomorrow is Easter. I still have to get my phrase book out and go downstairs to the desk to find out what time Easter Liturgy is, then I can go to bed.

Monday is a holiday in Ukraine-the Monday after Easter, so if the markets are open, we will take the kids to get some clothes. Tuesday they see the doctor here, but that is not the exam needed by our embassy. I think they need this one before the court date. We are hoping for an end of the week court date-maybe Thursday??? I hope so.

Sometime soon, if Jim is feeling better, he may take the mini-bus/van that goes from Ivankiv to Kyiv to visit an internet café and upload all of these updates.

Happy Easter!

Sunday, April 11, Easter,

Jim was sick all day today. If he is not feeling better by tomorrow, I’m going to ask for some remedies at the orphanage. If that is not incentive to feel better, I don’t know what is!

I asked at the hotel desk this morning about time for Easter liturgy at the Orthodox Church, but the woman there was clearly not religious, and had absolutely no idea! So I decided to go to the orphanage, and see if I could find out there. (They do not list times on a handy board out front here!) Tanya told me they were going to church at 4. She held up four fingers. 4 o’clock. Swell, I’ll just go with them.

The kids were enjoying their kindereggs, and the toys in them too. I’m very glad we got them for them. They were also enjoying the “lemonade” we got for them, making sure not to waste a drop of it.

We tried to watch Shreck, but the “play” would not work when I clicked on it, so we settled for Ice Age. It is a very cute movie, but much of the humor in it is language based, so interest was not really high. We looked at our books again, and Dima repeated many, many words in English with me. He will not have any problem with pronunciation. Tanya will have a little more, but not much. There is another Tanya here who is also taking English with our Tanya. She is very interested in the books I brought, and practicing saying and reading the words. These kids really want to learn.

Tanya, Dima and I came back and checked on Jim, then went to get something to eat. The restaurant (now know to Jim as “chez death!”, was closed, so we went to the grocery store. I got a carton of milk, and some water, and got them each a drinkable yogurt. Plus some kind of layered cookie thing that looked good. Back at the orphanage, we ate and drank, then ½ hour later, it was time for lunch. They ran downstairs and were back in 5 minutes. Doesn’t take them long at all! After lunch, it was Dima’s naptime, but before he could lay down, it was brought to Tanya’s attention that it was almost time to leave for Church. I thought it was at 4!, but no, it was 2-I keep forgetting 24 hour clock. She was trying to say 14! I ran back to the hotel to see if Jim was up for the service, but he was not, so I ran back. We left for church, but it was not at the Orthodox church. It was a Protestant Church service. We stayed for about an hour and a half, then left, and headed back to the orphanage. I brought out the Uno cards, which are another really good idea! You can work on colors and numbers in English, all the while playing a fun game! Didn’t take long to teach them how to play, and I left them with Tanya to play with her friends tonight. She liked that idea.

While on the way to church, Tanya told me that she wanted to be called Catherine. I will double check with Maxim when he arrives on Tuesday and can fully translate, but I asked 3 different times in different ways and got the same answer each time. She wants to be called Catherine, and Dima wants to be called James. Not Jim, or Jimmy (He looks like a “Jimmmy”, but James. Such a big name for such a little guy). I offered Tanya Catie, Cathy, Cate, and Catherine, along with strongly suggesting we keep calling her Tanya, but she was insistent. So, I guess we have a Catherine and James, instead of Tanya and Dima. IT was always our intention to allow them to choose to be called by another name, if they REALLY wanted to, but I was not expecting it to happen so fast. Could be a “new beginning, new name” kind of thing. I’ll ask Max on Tuesday.

After Uno, it was dinner time. I told Tanya that I had cleared it with Galina, the director, for us to eat at the orphanage tonight. She was pleased. I’m glad I did and got to experience what they do for meals.

Meal time is called, and one caretaker stands at the door, guarding it from anyone entering. 2 children are assigned to be helpers, and they carry each plate from the ½ door where it is served, to the tables. There were 6 tables, each seating 6 children. I thought there were a lot more children there, but tonight, that was it. 6 tea cups of tea were already on the tables, and the helpers placed one salad plate of the rice mixed with a very few pieces of meat, at each place. It was a gooy glop of food, like a sticky rice pilaf, with some sort of tomatoe “base” (like tomatoe soup?) that held it all together. And there were large pieces of bread in a bowl at the table. No butter, but heavy, (good) Ukrainian bread. Then the kids are allowed in. They swarm in, each taking their respective places at their respective tables. By the time they are all in and sitting down, the workers have placed a large bucket and dish cart in the dining room, and almost immediately children are finished and scraping their plates into the bucket. A lot of the food was not eaten.
I thought I was going to actually eat with Tanya and Dima, but I was directed to a table at the back of the room. Once all of the children were fed, the workers sat to eat. They had the same food as the children, along with leftover hardboiled eggs from breakfast, and a few things they brought from home. I must say, I felt very funny at first, having this food laid out for me, while the children did not have the same stuff. But these things were from the private homes of the workers, who brought food to work, like anyone else would. I left there with 3 pieces of “Pasch” bread- a special Easter only bread, homemade by one of the worker’s mother’s, and tried to share it with Tanya and Dima. They both refused, saying that they had some this morning! So I guess they do get some treats like that.

Back to dinner. I participated in an egg breaking ceremony for the hardboiled eggs, and sampled a few other homemade dishes. Only one did I not care for. It was some kind of gelatinous meat based product, eaten cold. I know that I’ve read about it and I’ll have to look it up. We had some good Ukrainian bread, and some tea. They kept pushing me to eat more and more, but I did have my fill, plus I have to save room for more protein.

We managed to communicate fairly well during dinner. They told me to not take Tanya and Dima to the restaurant any more, that it was too expensive. Jim and I should both be eating there with them, at the orphanage, and not at the restaurant! I think I was invited to go to the Orthodox church next Sunday, if we are still here, with one of the ladies, but I’m not sure. During all of our discussions, I received a phone call on the orphanage phone! It was Maxim,who was feeling very uneasy since we are in Ivankiv, and he is not, and he has not been here in a couple of days. I reassured him that we were indeed ok, and that I was having dinner, talking to the caregivers in the orphanage. He asked about Jim, and I told him he had a “touch of food poisoning”. He offered to talk to one of the staff there about helping us get some kind of remedy, but I said I would talk to them tomorrow if Jim is not feeling better.

Which brings us back to the beginning of today, and time to close. If Jim is feeling better tomorrow, and Galina is in the orphanage, I may ask her if we can take the kids on the bus to Kyiv, visit the internet café to upload these updates, go to McD’s (no doubt their first experience with that, and maybe get them an outfit or two). Busses (really mini-vans) run every 30minutes or so, and it could be a lot of fun, if we are allowed!

Hopefully this will be up tomorrow.
Until then……..


Monday 4-12-04
Mary here,

Jim felt some better today, and was able to visit with the kids a little while, off and on. Recovery from food poisoning is NOT fun!

We went to the orphanage about 9:15 this morning, and Tanya was there, but not Dima. One of the workers told Tanya to take us to the church where Natalia, another worker, was with Dima. I had spoken last night to Natalia about going to the Orthodox Church in town. I thought she meant next Sunday. Apparantly, she meant today! She was there with Dima and a few other kids. Tanya took us, and Tanya, Dima and I stayed through the entire liturgy-which was long! Jim was feeling very weak, hot, sweaty, and dizzy, and decided that rather than pass out in church, he would head back to the hotel!

After church, Tanya, Dima and I walked back to the hotel, and Jim was feeling better, so he accompanied us back. We first went to some stores in seach of clothing for the kids. We found a pair of gym shoes for Dima (U.S. less than 6.00!) and a "jogging suit" for him, too. (about 8.00) I think he would wear about a 5-6 in U.S. sizes, Julie, if you see anything while you are out and about. The "pickings " are very slim here, and we decided to hold off on any other purchases until tomorrow. The large outdoor market should be fully up and running tomorrow-the Monday after Easter is a holiday here, so not much was open. I got Tanya and Dima each a drinkable yogurt. They don't get any milk in the orphanage, and they like the yogurt. So at least this way they are getting some calcium every day.

Back to the orphanage, it was lunch time. The workers invited us to eat lunch with them, but Jim is not up to eating anything yet, and I had just finished a protein bar, so we passed. When Dima layed down for a nap after lunch, we taught Tanya to use the video camera and she went off to video her home and friends! A few false starts and she was up and running like a pro!

Jim started to feel run down again, so he left to go back to the hotel, and I stayed with the kids. The Orthodox church came to the orphanage today to give an Easter presentation. They gave each child a hard boiled egg, and two coloring books with Bible stories in them. They also donated a few Bibles to the orphanage. It is nice to see that religion is accepted in this post Soviet system. Tanya wanted to video the entire presentation, as it included part of the choir singing, but the batteries ran out, and she was not able to. After the "concert" as Tanya put it, we walked back to the hotel to get the batteries charging, then back to the orphanage. We played Uno a time or two, and just passed the time.

The older girls, at least, here do their own laundry by hand. They wash it in a wash tub, rinse and wring it in the sink and hang it to dry on a rack in the bathroom. I told Tanya she would be doing her own laundry at home, too. Her eyes got really big, then smiled and asked if we had a washing machine! She laughed when I told her yes, getting the teasing I was doing with her!

I ate dinner with the kids again tonight-it was some "mystery meat" patty-I'm sure more filler than meat, but not bad tasting, a LARGE serving of mashed potatoes, and bread. Warm, sweat tea, and a hard boiled egg rounded out the meal. It filled me up. These kids eat FAST. I still can't get over it. And they all eat only with a large serving spoon. Seems sad to see these older girls, who clearly care much about their appearance, trying to dress as stylishly as possible, keeping themselves clean and well groomed, shoveling food so fast into their faces.

Tomorrow is the big day-the kids are going for some physical here tomorrow morning at 8 am. We do not go for that one, it is not the one required by the embassy. Max will be here in the morning, trying to get that final signature to turn into the NAC. Hopefully, the inspector will sign readily in the morning, and he can run it back to Kyiv right away. I think he said there is other papework to do tomorrow as well. If we have a chance, and are allowed, we would like to take Tanya and Dima to Kyiv, possibly on Max's return, to do some shopping, visit the internet, visit McDonalds, and return to Ivankiv late tomorrow afternoon.

We will see how well those plans work out....




Tuesday 4/13/04

Man--- The “Diner of Death” really did me in.

Thanks to the I-player, Michael Savage’s and Sean Hannity’s books and the Kyiv Post (which I have now read through 5 times) I have avoided going insane.

I have had probably a total of 1litre of coke/sprite and another litre of water plus a banana and one zone bar since I lost my battle with the spoiled chicken on Friday. Forget Dr Atkins-the “Diner of Death” Ukraine Diet is the way to go-I have probably dropped 15-20 pounds over the long weekend. I have been able to spend some time with the kids, but I wear down after about 90 minutes.

Today we arrived at the orphanage and went with the kids to the “hospital” (really the local clinic). They have to get a paper signed by all the specialists there to be released for adoption.

A note on Socialized Heath Care-

The theory is noble and wonderful-the reality is otherwise. Doctors make on the order of $50/mo. Thus the best and the brightest have either left Ukraine for the US or have changed professions- to be able to better support their families. Those that remain are over burdened and work in conditions far below our standards in the US. Patients wait in huge lines to be seen-actually several huge lines-

Line 1 Check in and get your chart-no HIPPA issues here
Line 2 Bloodwork
Line 3 Specialist (or many lines if you are going for a checkup)
Last line-back to return your chart.

Be sure while walking and waiting to avoid colliding with the open testubes of biohazardous materials being hand transported from one area to another.

It’s an all day (or several day process).

We had trouble getting in to see our primary in Vegas-we fired her--- here you are stuck with what you have--FOREVER.


After a couple hours moving from line to line with the kids, we decided to get back to the orphanage (Max was to meet us there for more paper signing this morning) . We found out that Ivankiv required that we meet with the Minister of Children’s Welfare (or something like that) and she must approve us prior to court. After our experience with the Inspector, we were a bit wary. Gallina (the Orphanage Director), Max, Mary and I made our journey into town for our “interview”. ---Side note-Max told Gallina that I was suffering from the “Ivankiv trots” and she insisted that we immediately go to the apothecary for something that will “make me all better by lunchtime” (I’m ALL for that). Stopped there and got some bitter herbs in a tablet form (if you want to look it up for me it’s called Laevomycetinum)-I was skeptical-but now I believe--- an hour later and I am beginning to feel “human” again.-Okay back to the main plot-

We met with the Children’s Welfare Minister-lots of questions, but not the “grilling” like we received from the Inspector. It’s very clear that they care very much for the children of the village and want to make sure they are placed in loving homes. They want to make sure that we will retain their Ukrainian roots and that the kids will be encouraged to stay in touch with those left behind. (funny since that was one of the first things we asked Max -What can we take back with us that will help them remember their homeland”?). We passed the test and she agreed to get all the paperwork done for us today so we could get a speedy court date (pray for Thursday).

We walked back to the orphanage to find that not all the required signatures were obtained at the Hospital. Max and one of the caregivers went back to get the needed signatures. Mary, Tanya, Dima and I walked through the Rynok looking for clothes for Tanya, then off to the hotel happiness for a quick lunch at the “Diner of Death”. (I passed on the food and went up to the room for a nap).


Waiting for Max at the hotel now-they really want to speak with him at the front desk-I think they are concerned that we will skip out on our bill (about $50USD for the entire week)

More later-----


It’s later-

Max just stopped by the room---frustrating day for him. The Inspector is holding out on signing the paperwork.. She legally has 10 days to do this--- normally it is done the same day-well-she does not like Max, us, or just does not like life. We have been approved by a social worker, the adoption agency, the INS in the US. In Ukraine we have been approved by the NAC, their psychologist, the Children’s Welfare Minister, the deputy mayor (both of whom are superiors of the Inspector) and the Orphanage Director, but this woman is not going to sign that paper without causing some pain… (no-We don’t think it is monetary pain) IWorst case-she could hold us in limbo until NEXT Thursday----arghhhhhhhhh we hoped to be HOME by next Wednesday.

On a happier note-We had a great day with the kids--- played puzzles in the hotel room-Tanya took lots of digital pics around the orphanage.

Tomorrow-we meet the kids at 8 and go shopping at the market for clothes. Max will be here by 8:30 and begin his quest to get the last piece of paper signed (wonder if he has thought of slipping some prozac in her Cik (juice).


The drama continues tomorrow



4-14-04 Wednesday

Ahhhh a new day of adventure.

Up early to meet Tanya and Dima at 8 to do some shopping before school. To add to the take home luggage:

2 Tanya pants
a really cool leather coat
2 pair of socks
a purse
nice “euro” skirt and blouse set

Dima racks up
Undies
A pair of “spiderman” jeans
2 pair of socks

grand total about 300UAH---about 60 bucks… try that at Dillards J

after shopping, it’s off the school for the kids and back to the Hotel for us.

************** side note***************

We ran into the Inspector (the difficult one) on the way to the Orphanage-she was pleasant and asked to meet us again later in the day as she was unsure about Max and his translation. Okay-whatever.

************** side note 2***************

A very exciting day here at the Hotel Happiness--- we got upgraded to a new room. It’s a wonderful 2 room “suite” complete with a tv and 2 single beds pushed together for a “faux queen” bed. We have our own potty and shower…Actually it’s nice-a couple of steps down from the Motel 6 in the US, but better than we usually stay in Western Europe.

***********back to the story****************

Max met us at the hotel and took us to the market--- Mary is doing very well with the language, but I am ready to eat some meat and do not want a repeat of the “Death Diner” experience. I’d prefer a native speaker to determine if the ham is fully cooked. Ahh it is! Some ham, cheese, bread, yummy stale raisin/cherry toast, a couple of bananas, Moloko, water and coke--- LUNCH! I ate a little-it was good-I may be ready for The “Diner of Death” again tonight!!

Maxim went off to get the much anticipated Inspector’s approval---heee hee hee good luck, Max!

Couple hours at the hotel and Max is back-The inspector keep putting him off-Methinks she does not like him. We decide to head to the Orphanage to get our couple of pages of social and educational questions about the kids answered. It’s very clear that the director has a very soft spot for these 2. She was in tears a good part of the time. Great Students, Great kids. (we already knew that)

Max is off again to try to lock down the approval from the Inspector (at this point we think she is toying with him)-It’s okay, Max-As Mary said, “this is great practice for your future job at the UN”!

Tanya and Dima are back from school-- Tanya wants and needs a haircut-they have a salon at the Hotel Happiness (go figure). Dima and I head back to the room to play cars, Mary and Tanya do the “hair thing”.

Really cute cut-We have heard horror stories about Stylists in the Former Soviet Union-this lady did a swell job-really…especially considering the total was about $2USD.

Back to get the kids to bed and then us to bed. Just saw Max-the Inspector’s approval is DONE!!!!!! YAY!

Tomorrow morning Max is here at 8 to get the final 2 signatures, then Mary, Max and I are off to Kyiv to the notary and the NAC (and the internet)--- Sorry to the Guys in Columbus--- your music will be in tomorrow’s upload---

More tomorrow!


Jim and Mary